A Journey of Love and Growth: Nate and Maddie’s Foster Care Story
by Natasha Ashenhurst
When we caught up with Nate and Maddie Graves-Wilson, they were living the dream in sunny Florida, basking in the warmth of a vacation filled with new experiences, relaxation and time together. What makes their family unique is the beautiful blend of both foster and biological children. Nate and Maddie embrace the idea of togetherness, bringing all their kids on adventures that create cherished memories. It’s a testament to their unwavering commitment to inclusivity and the genuine love they share with each and every child in their care.
In a decision that defied conventional expectations, Nate and Maddie embarked on a remarkable foster journey, even though they already had five beloved biological daughters. The couple’s motivation sprang from a shared calling to make a meaningful difference in their family and community. Nate, working in a church, and Maddie, deeply involved in social services, felt compelled to extend their love and care beyond their own home and reach out to those in need.
“Becoming a foster parent with Community Youth Services was a natural step for me, given my background in Social Services and my passion for supporting youth and families. Grays Harbor had a shortage of foster homes, and my husband and I felt compelled to open our hearts and home to more kids in need,” said Maddie. “With five biological children of our own, we knew the more, the merrier. Initially licensed with a different agency, we transitioned to CYS a couple of years ago, drawn to the fact that many of their staff are foster parents themselves.”
Their lives took an unforeseen turn when their friends, who were moving away, offered them the chance to occupy their large house in Elma. Seeing this as a serendipitous opportunity, Nate and Maddie made a life-changing decision and took their first placement.
Nate and Maddie firmly believe that fostering has been instrumental in cultivating empathy within their entire family, especially their biological children. Witnessing their parents open their hearts and home to foster siblings has helped their children develop a profound sense of inclusivity and compassion. As more and more kids became part of their family, Nate and Maddie’s children learned the importance of advocating for their siblings, understanding the need to communicate boundaries and supporting them unconditionally.
“Exposure to the diverse experiences of their youth in care has led our biological kids to appreciate the blessings in their own lives and foster a deep sense of gratitude. They’ve gained a deeper understanding of the struggles some of their peers might face, making them more compassionate and considerate members of their community,” said Nate.
Nate and Maddie cannot speak highly enough about the unwavering support and invaluable resources provided by the Community Youth Services Foster Care Program.
“Because we are experienced foster parents, we’re often the first family to assess and support children with limited information available. The program’s emphasis on assessing the strengths and challenges of each child ensures they receive the care and attention they require to thrive,” said Maddie.
Nate and Maddie attribute much of their success as foster parents to the program’s support, which has helped them develop effective communication skills and the ability to establish firm yet loving boundaries with their foster children. These skills have been crucial in providing a safe and nurturing environment for the youth in their care, enabling them to flourish and reach their full potential.
The couple has found immense joy in seeing youth, initially resistant to change, gradually transform into motivated and determined individuals, taking ownership of their education and demonstrating remarkable improvement in various aspects of their lives. Witnessing such transformation and growth has been a deeply fulfilling and rewarding experience, reinforcing their belief in the profound impact of foster care and the potential for positive change in each child’s life.
When Nate and Maddie share their fostering experience with others, one of the most common reactions they hear is, “I would never be able to let them go because I’d love them too much, and I’d get too attached.” Nate and Maddie firmly believe in building lasting relationships with each child, even in short-term placements.
“We believe in the profound impact of love and care, even short term. Any positive experience can have a lifetime of impact,” Nate said. “Even if you only share one weekend, you are building a trusting relationship they’ll carry with them forever.”
One particular success story that deeply touched their hearts was when a child they fostered during the school year was reunited with her mom.
“She continues to text us daily and tell us she misses us, and we miss her. You should fall in love with these kids. You should build relationships, but hold loosely to those you love and don’t hurt them with your unreasonable expectations,” said Maddie.
This experience reinforced their belief that fostering is not just about helping others but also about their own growth as individuals. It has taught them valuable lessons about empathy, compassion, and the significance of holding on to relationships with an open heart. These lessons have prepared the family to navigate life’s transitions with love, support, and a deep understanding of the profound impact they can have on the lives of those they touch through fostering.
Maddie said, “I am grateful for the impact CYS has had on our lives and the lives of the youth we’ve had the privilege to care for. It’s been a journey of growth and hope, and I am proud to be a part of such a compassionate and dedicated program. If you’re considering becoming a foster parent, I encourage you to take the leap and join the Community Youth Services Foster Care program. Together, we can make a difference in the lives of these incredible young individuals.”